its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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