Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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