Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
