I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
