she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize