I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize