Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
