Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
