I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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