that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
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