Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize