I murdered the dance floor call the cops
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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