I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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