you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
