i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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