i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.