I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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