he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
