omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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