Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Even my vagina gasped.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
