I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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