He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
is it fun? or sober?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
