So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
