Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
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His apartment number was 69. I had to.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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