I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.