I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize