Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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