You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
