Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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