spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
The adults are the big ones right?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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