I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
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She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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