Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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