I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize