worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
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