you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
