fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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