I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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