Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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