Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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