I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
