Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
