you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
