And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
