It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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