Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
