She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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