i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just found puke in my bra..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
