2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
