I'm drive I can fine osifer
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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