I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
