He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
